Rub N’ Tug

17 mins read

Readers, Daiyu Tang here! I’m pleased to give you the low down on the recently reopened (post fire damage) Rub N’Tug that is located down on Bourbon St. near to Poison Apple, the XXX store, Titty Twister and other shops and service providers in central Hathian.

As with our other business reviews, whether restaurants, clubs or bakeries we try and ensure that we let you know about both the location, the service and the owner or their staff. In this instance we were approached by the RnT’s owner Max who wanted to talk about her business, some of the history and introduce us to the services they offer (which to be clear, we are not advertising anything illegal, we are just reviewing what we were told).

Meeting Max & Starr

Our approach was that we needed to deal with the elephant in the room. The obvious linkage between at the very least, the advertising outside the RnT (which includes the neon with half removed panties over the outline of a woman) and what might go on inside. We’re not judging, but we do want to clear up the range of things that *might* happen, so that you, our reader is best equipped (and so legally we don’t get told we’re helping to solicit!).

Max: “I’m Max, yeah. Owner of dis fine establishment. We don’t -provoke- anyt’ing But w’atever ‘appens, ‘appens, right? If that means, you want to.. indulge in some fine adultery, or ‘not’er kind of sexual ‘ndeavor… dat is not my problem. As long as consent, is well… consented?

Consent is always key and we believe that really helps to make sure that you know what when you’re dealing with Max and her staff that they’re not some abused or trafficked girl like perhaps down the backwaters. These people (and we interview Starr, one of the staff later) want to be here and at least as they say it, Max looks out for them and pays properly. In short, the RnT might not *look* the best, but why pay for chrome and bling if you don’t actually pay the important things, the men and women who work there.

Observer: “Totally, I get that about consent. So what I’ll focus on is the relaxation and then need to offer something like this in Hathian. As you say not for me or others to be the moral police, especially in Hathian where when you’re not actively hurting anyone you’re pretty much a saint! Ok, so let us maybe start with who you are and how you came to run this place? Why and wherefores and all that…”

Max: “It’s a long story, actually, dating back to like, two thousand and seventeen, and the Pink Family. They are unfortunately, a lesser known breed these days, but yanno, back in the day, they had a mighty fine grasp on Hathian and it’s businesses. One of them, David, his mother was a former business associate, Bebe Pink… But.. as far as I know de Rub ‘N Tug is originally founded by the oldest line-age in Hathian, de Jung-Pink Family, more than I think by now, fifty years ago. They passed it down for a while, to anyone being interested runnin’ it. And I got involved wit’ dis place back in two-t’ousand and seventeen.”

The Pinks… Like David Pink, the Observer had come across them before. He was the one who had a son who had disappeared and as we understood it murdered. We covered this in early 2023, so nearly a year ago. We also know that very sadly, Bebe Pink passed away before her time.

Max: “So, at dat time it was ran by Jacqueline Pink, better known as Jack. She did an senses event, and it’s ‘ow we’ve met t’roug’ some connections. I’ve became ‘er rig’t ‘and woman, and for a year or so, s’e would conduct businesses ‘ere and in Japan, s’e would regularly c’eck up on me, and see ‘ow we were doing. We’ve came extremely attached, but like business in Japan needed Jack’s attention more, t’an s’e was needed elsew’ere, so gradually I took over. I learned de trade, and customs, and I’m still to dis day, trying to ‘onor deir ways, and you know… de actual skill of massages, and traditional teas.”

This explained why when we visited RnT there was also a focus on teas, with different items available and a link, that Max had covered on her Twitter (private – request needed).

Max: “Before dat, I dabbled. But, I kind of, got stuck in ‘ere. Trying to.. ‘Onor.. my associate’s.. craft. I found it ‘ard for a w’ile to manage it by myself, so I made sure it was taken over… but eventually, Lauri was going to run de XXX Shop, and I’d seen dis place.. and de state it was in, believing dat a little ‘love’ could turn dis around again, so… I invested my savings, to take over, once again.”

A tale that had gone for a few years, we understood that now Max was back and had ideas on how this place would make her money, while also perhaps being slightly more serious and sensual than before.

Our Staff & Services

We asked Max about who she had working for her and how things might work with some of the locals – Harlots and Rejects and that lot that make up the area around the RnT.

Starr – one of the RnT staff members

Observer: “So, you took over, have grown it out and then got it fully under your control now, after a break. So… working around here, you’ve got a few gangs to content with… RejectsHarlots… I guess both of those are different kinds of trouble, or perhaps you don’t see them that way? And maybe you can tell me a bit about your staff and rate yourself on your massage skills! Do you have any men on staff?”

Max: “We’ve ‘ad some recent troubles.. but non-gang related… Eh, I known Carly for a long time, but you know. Idea’s ideologies s’ift, and I try to keep friends in all sorts of places. We all know gangs are like cock-a-roaches… we don’t want to keep ’em in, but we can’t really keep ’em out eit’er.. So, I try to yanno.. do w’at I can to keep dis place as neutral as I can be…”

That’s a fair position to have – ignore, contain and be neutral. Like Z with Prohibition. Perhaps inside many of the Bourbon Street places, this concept of neutrality can help citizens have fun… maybe just leaving how they get there (and out again) via the streets the hard part!

Max: “As for staff, we’ve got dis pretty lady Starr… Another called ‘Halo’ and Anna, we’ve welcoming newcomers as we speak, but dose few ‘ave really ‘elped to form de Rub ‘N Tug in de last few months. I give all ’em a solid ten out of ten, but I’d be a poor business owner, if I wouldn’t.”

Observer: “So obviously certain types of massages are… sensual… what else do you offer?”

Max: “But, yeah. I’m trying to get everyone toget’er to teac’ em about sport massages too, not just de sensual kind — so, we can also give somet’ing back to de community, and dose injured.. in de end, I would welcome men as staff too, but I t’ink our men in town, care more for bitches and bling, instead of.. massages.”

Observer: “Sports Massage is a good idea, I mean you could possibly even go visit the University with your staff sometime… setup in the dorms, or something and offer sports massages to the students? The Ballbusters could probably actually use something like that…”

Starr ready to perform a (non sexual) massage

Observer: “So Starr, what brought you to work here, and don’t suck up to the boss for me!”

Starr: “Halo, mostly…I hadn’t met Max, until not that long ago. Halo brought me in to help with a particularly demanding client and the money was too good to pass up. Ten bucks an hour across the street at the porn shop wasn’t cutting it. But I still work there for the discount!”

I didn’t have time for a massage, rather just the chat and a staged shot or two, but see below for a competition to win free massage vouchers and I’ll be sure if I ever have aches and pains to consider whether RnT can help!

John Doe – He Can’t Afford the Observer

While we were concluding the interview, sitting on the sofa and chatting, we were interrupted, by a real ‘customer’. In this particular instance there might have been some history between Max the the ‘John’ who we understand is in fact an HPD officer, although we weren’t able to get a name before we were ushered out the door in the interests of promoting peace (and business services).

It has to be said that the individual was perhaps not the most… relaxed. Nor subtle. I mean, if I wanted a massage and perhaps if Starr was around AND it was something very special, I could see the risk of getting erotically entangled… But this guy? He was all guns blazing…


Unknown male – likely HPD officer

How do you respond to something like this? The Observer was about to get a lesson in customer service (or perhaps as it would have been fun, how to toss someone off… the porch…)

Max: “Eh. Fuck, you too. I don’t think anyone’s available for you right now. But you could always try de alley, round de corner. Must be into piggies, as they’re on the wiener menu.”

Starr: “Could do a quickie!”

It has to be handed to Starr, she has a sure focus on customer service, despite the fact it seemed to be that her boss wasn’t so happy with this particular individual.

Piggie: “I’m not’ leavin until one of you jerks’ me off. You can do it.”

At this point readers, I should like to point out that requesting a Happy Ending from a reporter, much less myself, after HPD had already rinsed me for my salary last month (thanks Officer Sawyer) it unlikely, to receive a heartfelt yes. Also, you’re in a massage place and you point at the only non-staff member! Christ. Cops. The RnT owner was not, initially helping, but it was almost funny, so we won’t be holding it against her when she said “wherever the story takes you right?” – it doesn’t take me to jerking off cops. Just to be clear.

Observer: “Apologies, I’m conducting an interview here, but if you’d like to feature more, you can strip and we can add those photos to the paper as well? Some cops love pictures in the paper…”

Sadly, the officer didn’t want to get naked and strip and this is despite it being rather well known that some officers love publicity. There’s a spark of Fyre in all of them… But it seemed, not enough this time to get naked for the paper. Oh well…

Max, kindly stepped in before things got a bit dicey and offered to take the man upstairs, where the RnT has a range of massage tables and so on.

Hopefully, whatever transpired there was fine (and legal).


Well, there’s not a lot more we can say – the place offers massages, tea… It has a long history and some famous faces have been associated with it in the past. It’s also featured in stories that you can read about in the Observer and being located on Bourbon, you know you might always find excitement, just not always in the way you intend. For me, it was a cop wanting a handjob… for you, what will it be? Find out and spend time with the lovely Starr and Max and the rest of their staff.

Vouchers – Your Chance to Win!

The Observer has three vouchers available for a free massage at the RnT, courtesy of management. If you want one, just send our editor a quick photo of yourself and why you need a massage the most. Best photo entries win and will be published in the Observer. T&C Apply.

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