THE HATHIAN BACHELOR: REN’S REVENGE

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(The following is a video posted on the Observer website of a special video pertaining to The Hathian Bachelor reality show.)

(AD PLAYS BEFORE THE VIDEO)
Watch the Colonel take each of the contestants on a date.
Visit https://hathianbachelor.weebly.com/episodes.html to catch up on missed episodes.

The camera enters Ren’s suite , which takes up the entire  top floor of the mansion, her attack dog , a tiny pug named Brutus the 8th scampers  under her bed to hide,  the camera  zooms in on a fully made up , perfectly coifed ‘sleeping’  Ren. Her eyes pop open, as if on cue and a smile lights her face . ” Good morning !” whipping the covers back she  jumps from bed  spinning like some sort of Disney Princess  moving behind the dressing  screen and emerging what seemed like seconds later  fully dressed, in a black cat suit and mask .  her dog trotting out the door and down the steps , ” he is probably going to make breakfast ” then wringing her hands together she  spoke softly into the camera , ” today I am paying back my  housemates , for trying to murder me  with saran wrap, if it gets wrapped around your head  a few times you can’t even breathe! That’s no joke I tried it ” pulling out  a pack of gum, she ripped into it  with delight , shoving piece after piece in her mouth and chewing  until her cheeks  bulged , making her way down the steps to the main living area , and then down to the basement where the other  women’s  smallish rooms were. ” Oh my gosh how do they live like this ?”swiping away a little saliva running from the corner of her mouth , knocking  on Max’s  door ,there was  no answer . Good thing because Max might get the  wrong idea if Ren showed up at her bedroom wearing a latex cat suit and mask. Making her way to the closet she opened it , then pulling little plugs of gum  from her mouth she stuck some on the bottom of each and every  shoe she could find , before crawling to Em’s  room , repeating the process ,her evil laugh needing some work,  then  on to  visit Ana … Ren held up  the last large pink wad of gum and went about  shoving it into the sole and treads of every shoe .  Hearing a noise she froze , shushing the entire camera crew and trying to usher them into a closet with her , waiting  for what seemed like  an eternity to Ren , 45 seconds ,  she threw open the door and ran to the  safety of her  suite  peeling off her mask and  unzipping her catsuit , ” That was close ….”

Getting ready for the day, Em would have a step up on Ren’s prank because one of the things she dislikes most is socks. As a result, she also avoids shoes when possible. Sandals were best.  That said, she had to move the shoes to access her luggage and found them stuck to the tile flooring in the closet. Curious, she’d pick it up and inspect it for a moment. The camera crew waiting expectantly for her reaction. Would she freak out? Scream, bitch about how expensive they were? No. Em wasn’t really the designer brand type. She gave a light snicker and a shake of her head. “I think they’ve housed me with three year olds…” Picking up the shoes afflicted with gun, she carries them into the kitchen. Whistling a song by Bowl of Soup, she’d stuff the shoes into plastic bags, and promptly shove her shoes into the freezer. Today, she’d go barefoot, which was fine by her! Em turns to the camera crew and chuckles. “I wonder what they’ll think of shoe-sicles!” Best way to remove gum is to freeze it first! Em would then head into the living room… She wouldn’t be keeping her music to herself today!

Ana hasn’t had to wear shoes for months, thanks to the casts.  It’s a miracle she brought any – high hopes? But she’s able to wear the braces now, so it’s a good thing she’s brought the shoes along.  She’s fortunate that the doctor told her she is likely to be wearing braces, so she brought her favorite sneakers with her.  When she arrives back at the mansion, the camera crew catches her with bags from a shoe store. As she’s putting things away in her room, under the crew’s watchful eye, she’s rearranging things.  Picking up her ‘spare’ pair of tennis shoes, she frowns when they stick to the floor.  “What the hell…” she mutters, giving it a yank and almost rocking herself back on her ass.  She scowls as some of the gum sticks to the carpet in the closet.  “Oh for the love of Peter, Paul and Mary!” she says, that southern drawl probably making it sound funnier.  She picks up the other shoe, turning it over to find a wad of gum stuck to that one as well.  “Christ on a stick…” she mutters, carefully prodding at the wad with the tip of her fingernail.  “It’s like Mikey all over again…”  A smirk tugs at her lips, and in a rare moment, she’s thankful she has an older brother that pulled these kinds of things when they were kids. Padding out to the kitchen she finds herself some ziplock bags to cram her shoes in and shoves them in the freezer – muttering and grumbling some obscenities as she moves things around in the small space.  “Clever girl.” she says, having no idea which one of them actually pulled the prank.  The other pair of shoes in the freezer tells her she’s not the only one hit.

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