Local Woman Gets Lucky

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A southern Louisiana woman’s life is changed forever today due to a quick trip in a New Orleans Gas Station. 22-year-old Delphine Laveau-Matfield of Hathian was just stopping off for a restroom break at Irish Bayou Citgo when she decided to play her luck with a Powerball ticket. “Mines period come on all hard and I had to stop because I was gonna bleed all over the car seat. It was like the F***’… what’s that waterfall up North called? Nigra Falls? That. I was real pissy and crampin’ like I been stabbed in the uterus and thought a ticket could cheer me up.” Delphine exclaimed in a brief interview.

Indeed, the ticket would be a life changer as this ticket just so happened to contain the winning numbers. “I was at home, helpin’ my sister be sober. She been on drugs an’ as a future doctah, I been tryin’ to help her. Get her sober… keep her clean. Po’ thang just helpless without me an’ my brother, Nick Matfield. He’s jus’ a saint. An officer and just about the kindest soul I ever done known. Then I checked the results, and I nearly done sh*t my pants. Messaged my daddy and had him double check it, and asked him what to do. I mean… what the f*** do I know about this sh*t. My maman was a murderer, not a financial helper type person, she ain’t never teach me this kind of stuff.” Says the lucky winner.

Delphine claimed her winnings in the early hours this morning. Living in the poorer region south of New Orleans, one must wonder what she will do with her new-found winnings? We asked her and she said, “I just can’t wait to help out my family. My daddy a doctah and he been helping me get my education. I’m gonna pay him back all he done spent and make sure he good. Gonna help my brother, Nick too and the rest of my family. But the rest of them can f*ck off. It’s my money. I f*ckin’ earned it. It ain’t easy bein’ a winner. Takes dedication and hard work. Perseverance.”

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