Sending Pigs to Pigs

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A pair of police officers had a battle with their own kind Wednesday night after someone let loose a gassy pig in the hospital’s recovery ward.

The animal was allegedly released by gang members Esperanza Hernandoz and Piper McAuley after they managed to somehow get past the hospital security.

Officers Andrea Mizser and Connor Wrydan finally catch the rouge animal.

“The security guards who let the perpetrators into the hospital with the animal have been placed on administrative leave until the acting Chief of Staff can deal with them,” assures Lake Gavilan-Soyuz, who was on the scene at the time of the incident.

After the pair were spotted fleeing, the pig, and what they did to it, was painfully noticed. The animal, unfortunately, was fed ex-lax, and started using the hospital’s recovery ward as its bathroom.

Officers Andrea Mizser, Connor Wrydan, and Bliour Michaels were called to the scene to forcibly remove the animal, and after lots of poop, pee, and farting, and a failed attempt with a taser and many long minutes of pig wrestling, they finally managed to corner the pig and detain it.

“All traces of the animal have been removed by the janitorial staff, and the pig was not harmed during its removal by the helpful officers of the HPD who responded,” assures Gavilan-Soyuz.

The animal, after causing around $10,000 in damages, was lovingly taken home by Michaels, showing us that even the whiniest, smellest creatures can find love, and this time, we’re not talking about the pig.

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