Mayor Reverses Course, Believes HPD Learned ‘Tough Lesson’

4 mins read

by Daiyu Tang, Girl Behind the Lens

Readers, it’s Girl Behind the Lens, Daiyu Tang, reporting to you for the Hathian Observer. I’m writing this after after the last week or so of lawlessness where the Hathian Police Department decided to stage their so-called ‘Strike’ as a result of Mayor Boxer’s bold reform plans. We’re still collating interviews and pictures of the damage, but as far as your reporter can tell, did anything really change? If it did, and you’re alive to tell us about it, contact the Observer! If you know anyone who was hurt and believes the strike caused it, get them to contact us, their story is hot currency at the moment.

Anyway, HPD, ever lackadaisical in their response to most things announced their strike and proceeded to issue demands from their spokeswoman, Carole King about Ice-Cream machines and all sorts of nonsense. When questioned about the impact of defunding or the success of their strike, she had little to say other than she wasn’t keeping track. Readers, if you were criminally minded, you don’t appear to have anything to lose by having this leadership back on the streets!

But in more interesting news and to perhaps bring to a conclusion this period of disruption I was approached by the Office of Mayor Bobby Boxer and asked to carry the following statement in the Observer. Have a glance over readers and then be sure to leave us a thought or two about this volte-face.

Statement from the Office of Mayor Bobby Boxer

Dear Voters and other citizens,

I hope you are all doing well despite possible minor incidents since the HPD closed its doors. My bodyguards didn’t report any significant issues so I’m sure all of you people managed just fine on your own.

Nonetheless, I, your mayor, have personally been working day and night from my whirlpool jacuzzi along with my two secretaries to resolve this issue. So I am proud to say we have been able to loosen some money from other sources, without too many cuts on the social welfare budget, to fund the HPD again so those poor misled officers won´t starve. I’ve also personally, after reading the poor woman’s pleas, provided a second-hand Ice-Cream machine for HPD.

Also, I – Bobby Boxer, believe in second chances and therefore I am sure this has been a tough lesson for the HPD not to do this again. Don’t be corrupt, don’t abuse prisoners and make sure, absolutely sure that the Mayor’s Office gets it’s fair allocation.

That, ahem, being said, we fund the HPD again and this should allow them to end this petty little strike at once and restore order again. ORDER I say.

Vote wise, vote mayor Bobby Boxer!

Well readers! So in the last week or so, that some of you told me were a ‘Purge’ might be over. It looks as though Mayor Boxer didn’t get to replace or otherwise reform the HPD leadership, but perhaps behind the scenes they’ll turn down the thug dial and push to the front ‘Protect and Serve’, we can only hope right?

Please leave your comments on the Observer’s website and as ever, the Observer’s reporters will keep you up-to-date on HPD, Gangs, Human Interest stories and more.

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