Dear Grace: Rusty

2 mins read

Dear Grace,

So I am dating this guy. We first started seeing each other as No Strings Attached, and the sex was fantastic. But then things started getting serious, and the relationship developed, and both of us said the magic words.

We both agreed we can sleep around as long as it’s not in each other’s circles, and we be honest with each other.

Issue is, he is in hospital, messed up and well, I am trying not to go elsewhere for my needs, because I feel like it would be a betrayal. Even if I have permission, it feels wrong. I am so conflicted, and just find myself considering acts with complete strangers.

What can I do to stop this feeling?

Cheers, Rusty

Dear Rusty,

By ‘magic words’ do you mean you said you love each other? If so, why the hell are you not at his side whilst he’s in hospital? Why are you not there helping to nurse him back to health? I imagine what he needs more than sex right now is you at his side. You should be prioritizing his health over your bodily needs.

Personally speaking, going for sex elsewhere whilst your boyfriend is in hospital, with or without permission, is a huge betrayal. I feel you have your priorities wrong. I also acknowledge he may see it differently.

Now to answer your question, what can you do to stop this feeling? Masturbate, porn, fantasize, purchase a vibrator. Self care is as important as getting others involved. Then when he gets out of hospital, jump him and show him how much you missed him. Or talk to your boyfriend and see what he thinks. You have permission, so it shouldn’t be a difficult conversation to have.

I hope this helps,


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