Lawyer Makes Opinion Heard

3 mins read

Late on the evening of the 19th, Greenlee Morrisey, manager of the Slim Goodies diner and part time lawyer, was attempting to see a pair of her clients, who was behind bars at the local prison. After numerous attempts to see the women to no avail, she opened her purse, and pulled out a red Sharpie.

On the wall facing the entrance of the police station, she wrote ‘The HPD are all cum guzzling gutter whores’, and was almost instantly maced and detained.

She received charges, ranging from vandalism and public nuisance, to obstruction of justice and conspiracy, and spent the night in jail, but that was the purpose of the vandalism according to the woman.

“The HPD was refusing to allow visitors into the jail.  This refusal allegedly included attorneys, which is a clear violation of the defendants’ rights.” said Mrs. Crumplebottom, long time secretary ((NPCed)) at the lawyer’s office. “Her two clients were being held, and Ms. Morrisey decided to purposely get herself arrested so she could speak with her clients.”

The graffiti has since been removed, much to the dismay of on-lookers and art fanatics alike.

Ironically, the very same day she was released, July 20th, Morrisey was put into the hospital during an unrelated incident involving one of the city’s biggest nuisances; Sharea Nightfire, who is also suspected in the recent murder of Lauren Lowtide.

Nightfire reportedly used Morrisey as a hostage, holding a knife to the woman’s throat and threatening to cut her neck in front of bystanders.

Police were instantly called, and because of the actions of the ‘cum guzzling gutter whores’, the lawyer managed to escape with her life, though she wasn’t unharmed. Her throat was sliced, stabbed in the chest, and Detective Senizen, who was called in to try and negotiate with Nightfire, was also stabbed.

Both victims were taken to hospital, and the detective has since been released, only having stayed overnight. Morrisey, however, remains in recovery.

When asked if the quick thinking of the police that night changed her less than stellar opinion about them, she stated that she might have been ‘overly broad in her generalization’.

“I would like to state, for the record, they are not ALL cum guzzling gutter whores. There are, perhaps, some that are not, and for that I apologize.”

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