By: Daiyu Tang
Photos: Daiyu Tang ((No AI))
I had been doing yoga outside at CU… It’s hot and I was feeling I needed to burn off some stress and tension. As you know dear readers, that is not usually how an article about a stabbing starts, but Hathian never cares much for my attempts at narrative dignity.
One minute I was stretching, sweating, and trying to convince myself that this pose was not my fantasising about the position in sex, but that I was actually doing honest good work for the soul. The next moment the news van’s scanner was alive with a 911 call reporting a woman stabbed outside Gein Burger on the Battle Street side. Yeah yeah, Daiyu you might say, you have nothing better to do than try and work off the horny and listen to cops chatting shit on dispatch. You’re right, at least today.
The caller, later identified on scene as an Alex, who it appeared had medical training and was likely with the FDH or HGH had his hands pressed to the female victim’s stomach and was trying to keep her conscious while waiting for help. The victim, identified as a ‘Bella’ and who appeared to be wearing a HGH pass, could be heard thanking him. HPD and EMTs were dispatched although, as I often tell Krystal, the 911 call also provided that sort of 911 professionalism that gives the services a bad name. Anyway, a problem for another day.
Oh and I still haven’t explained why this lead photo is of a woman’s bum and a thong that is not really even trying to provide dignity. Wait for it ok? It’s a good bun (one / bum) – god this heat…
From Bad To Wurst
I arrived in the Observer van slightly ahead of more useful ’emergency services’, which is an established Daiyu tradition, and found Officer Derek Ghostly on scene with Bella, Alex, and various paramedics arriving to take over treatment.
Bella was conscious enough to tell Ghostly that an ‘Asian guy‘ had attacked her. Let’s just expand on our ‘not racist’ thought process… Asian man. Knife. Violence? And that was before tattoos could be mentioned… Half the street will whisper ‘Yuugen’. Now from my perspective it is a bias that this city has trained people to make, which is precisely how suspicion becomes another form of local pollution. Once every Asian is a Yuugen then all Yuugen are Asians and we get lynch mobs…
Coming Back For Sloppy Seconds
A blond man later identified in the scene as a ‘Saiko’ returned near the active crime scene with a woman right behind him. It is her bum in the photo above and, after showing pictures around this Yuuko person was identified. Now you can put a name to a bum.
Initially she appeared to be walking with him, like maybe on a date. This impression changed rather violently once events unfolded. Saiko went to apparently assault Officer Ghostly while the officer was still managing the stabbing report and the EMTs were treating Bella. He approached with a knife and, in public view, threatened the officer with a blade held to his neck. Let’s pause… just say it with me, one stabbing a day is too much. Ghostly raised his hands and tried to talk him down. Bella, still wounded, reacted visibly to the returning chaos while Alex stayed with her until the EMTs could move her onto a gurney and into the ambulance.
The situation worsened when Saiko appeared to drive a blade into Ghostly’s shoulder. Ghostly re continued speaking, loudly enough for those nearby and this reporter’s camera to catch the broad strokes. He called Saiko by name and warned him that making headlines for attempted murder of a cop while being filmed by the Observer was, and I paraphrase only slightly, ‘not the cleverest tactical plan of the morning’. You don’t say.
At that point, Yuuko, who until seconds earlier looked like part of the problem became something else entirely. She rushed in, drew her own blade, and threatened Saiko in turn, demanding he get away from Ghostly. What followed was one of those Hathian cuddle-piles of violence where three people, multiple knives, and the concept of de-escalation all ended up on the pavement arguing with gravity and continued to support Hathian’s second most favourite threesome activity.
Ghostly repeatedly ordered Yuuko to step back and told her to trust him. Sasaki continued demanding something from the officer, though much of that exchange was low or whispered and not something the Observer will pretend to have heard clearly.
I did call 911 again once it became obvious that one officer, a wounded victim and unarmed EMTs were not exactly an ideal response to several blades and a man apparently auditioning for “fastest way to become everyone’s problem”, while live on the Observer’s cameras. No answer came which may mean dispatch was overloaded, distracted, vaping into a headset again, or making bets on whether Ghostly would win or die.
Eventually, Yuuko stepped back after repeated instructions from Ghostly, visibly distressed but complying. The immediate scene settled enough for Bella to be transported and for the standoff to move toward resolution.
A later HPD account provided to the Observer indicated that once she had backed off and the suspect lowered the threat, Saiko was ultimately tased and taken into custody by Officer Ghostly.
A Foot Long To Go
And all of this happened in the street, in public, under a golden sky that made the whole thing look much prettier than it deserved. As for Gein Burger, its wall still advertises food that will ‘blow your mind away’ but sadly their 12 inch soggy bun is a poor substitute for the real thing which in Hathian, is apparently not that ‘short’ in supply… but is never around when wanted.
